Random Actors in Perfect Roles In Awesome Movies (RAPRAM)

A little more on this week's RAPRAM. Kylie Minogue in Street Fighter: The Movie

I last saw this movie on one of the multitude of movie channels on digital cable, while I was avoiding writing what turned out to be a sub-par appellate brief (there's the legal tie in!!!).

First, full disclosure: I saw this movie in the theaters when I was 9 (according to imdb.com it came out in 1994, you can do the math). It is just as amazing today as it was back then. C movie directors have truly lost their magic in creating cr*p that is truly enjoyable. I'll take Street Fighter over any Scary Movie or parody of the same mold.

Kylie particularly stands out as Jean-Claude Van Damme's second-in-command at the AN (Allied Nations). Did I mention this movie is also great for its deep social commentary on peacekeeping? First, the movie is great for its attempt at representing international cooperation: each character is given a particular nationality that they must display via a patch or fake accent. Jean-Claude with his great unhidden Belgian accent, is, of course, the American. And, Kylie is British, because she is in fact Australian, impeccable logic. The rest of the breakdown of nationalities are American, American, American, Hawaiian, Native American, American, and bunch of others.... oh and the movie takes place in Thailand. I don't think there are any Thai people actually in it though.

Second, Kylie is great for her, I think, 3 lines, and high kicks. This of course set her film career up for such memorable roles as Dr. Petra von Kant in Bio-Dome, and "guest-star on Doctor Who." (Did I mention the main character is Raul Julia, one of the greatest actors of our time? Seriously, look him up people!!!!!)

In summation, mostly Kylie's performance in the movie for me consisted of: "Is that that [Australian Singer who is ridiculously famous everywhere in the world except America]?" followed 80 minutes later during the credits with yes, yes it is. Hooray for mid-90s C-movies that attempt international affairs commentary with concepts based on pixelated video games, that really have no plots to begin with.

Suggestion for next week: somebody from Mortal Kombat (the movie), possibly Christopher Lambert (a.k.a. Highlander, and the only person that I partially recognize from the cast of Mortal Kombat). Hey, he dated a Princess!!

And now some motivational speaking from Jean-Claude himself, this is why I went to Law School "I'm not going home, I'm going on a boat!!!!!"